Release

Yesterday, Sir and I went to the mall around noon to gather job applications. Right after he was laid off my boss went through some personal issues that she no longer required my services so now with my birthday, our planned date to wed, thanksgiving, and  Christmas all right around the corner we are jobless.

We spent day before yesterday scrubbing and organizing my now former bosses house so that due to things that happened between her and her husband cps would have no reason to deny her rights to her own children so by yesterday with the job losses and day of scrubbing and organizing we were both stressed and in dire need of an outing.
Turns out the job search was part one of exactly what we needed.
We spent the day in the mall u til around 6pm flirting here and there with different girls and just feeling good to be out of the house and not worrying.
Then we came home and had a semi quickie before calming down for dinner.
Later after he finished up each placing another application we made love again.
Im beginning to think he enjoys getting me to the point of calling him vulgar things as begging for my orgasm isn't enough anymore on most nights that he talks me to beg.
last nights choice outburst was "please you mean fucking sir!!" with tears in my eyes.
For that I was awarded permission to cum as well as a nice quick but hard spanking!

Balanced Trust

First off, I want to apologize for the crumby quality of my POV on that last post, I've learned not to even attempt to write when im in fuzzy place. I will try and fix that post tonight.

Now, onto to the title: truth.

In any aspect of this lifestyle whether it be master: slave, dom:sub, owner:pet , daddy dom:little girl,  ECT there are key aspects that are a must. TRUST being at the top of that list.

I have this topic on mind because of a young girl I have been speaking with, she reminded me yesterday of how alot of us are as newbie's to the lifestyle. Some of us understand that in order to be in this lifestyle we have to invest alot of trust in our opposite role, our other half in the equation. But through this we sometimes believe we have to give our full trust to someone simply because they are the other half and often times that trust is placed in the wrong hands and people get hurt.

On the other side of the coin are the people who remain cautious but they remain so cautious that they give no trust to even the right people and thus do not gain the true  experience of the lifestyle either.

Then there are those who dont even have the trust in themselves to know their limits and speak up if something is too much for them. Those who just want to fall completely in with no regards because they think they have to do it that way.

All three of these paths lead us to pain and in improper introduction to the lifestyle.

I thinkehen entering into anylife path whether be those I've listed above or even a venture to a new geographical location, caution must be taken to learn proper methods and safety guidelines. Research what you are getting yourself into. Find a mentor.

So many people dive in headfirst with whichever if the three takes. I listed above and find themselves in a lot of emotional and physical pain that they weren't yet ready or prepared for.

I myself when I first entered this lifestyle years ago fell into the role of giving full trust and submission to someone who was ill prepared to be a dominant figure to anyone much less myself.
However I do t regret it much. It eventually taught me alot abput choosing my words and actions carefully and how not to later treat my own submissives whether they be a semi oermanant bond or a mentoring position. Would I rather for other people to learn the same way I did? Hell no! That's the point of this post. Did I eventually learn all I needed to though? In a way yes. But I also learned much of what I learned through online research and dealing out others in the lifestyle. I learnined from being careful and not making the same painful mistakes twice. I am learning everyday by interacting with others in the lifestyle as well as taking my dominants role. 
Through all of this I have learned and farther learning to balance what degree of trust to give to who and what situations.
Initially my Sir did not receive my full trust that wasn't something I had to give to him increasingly.

breaking points (EXPLICIT)

Well I suppose it showed somewhere on my body the need for his inflicted pain. Tonight, after dinner Sir and I watched an episode of "The L word" since he promised to watch it with me yesterday but didn't. Then after each cleaning up a bit, him first then I, we began our play time. While I was freshening up he had lit the candle and had the toys ready but where I didn't see them. He asked was originally going to cuff my hands but we could only find one through out the night so they were instead bound with a pretty silk sash that we have. Next I was blindfolded and placed into position. I know the first toy was my beloved flog. He started out light and gentle for only a few swipes. Then really began biting onto me with it. My ass, back, shoulders, and legs were all to be treated. During some moments even my feet and neck. Next was the riding crop, a few hard stings across the ass then he  began flicking it all along my inner thighs. A feather teaser and then more alternating lashings with the flog.
"on your knees" he finally tells me
So I get up onto them expecting him to be aiming for places he couldn't reach when I was laying down or bowed. Instead I feel this hard cocks tip on my lips.
"may I use my hands?" I ask
"yes"
"thank you"
I take him in one hand and rub down to the base while stroking his thighs with the other and sucking him off. He begins flogging me harder and im getting so fucking wet so I start sucking on him more and really trying to please him and his hardness.

Im having so much difficulty remembering everything right now. Being blindfolded you are so much more focused on the sensations the where and the how isn't so much important to your mind to screenshot and order as the sensations are.

I do remember at one point after more delicious beatings and then being flipped to lay on my back Sir was having fun with orgasm control. He was running the toys across my clit and the rest of my pussy, enjoying shoving things in and getting me off as well as using his devilish mouth on my thighs and pussy.
I got close to orgasm and he reminded me I was not to cum
I began to beg, repeating please more intensely over and over and he repeatedly told me no.
Finally when I felt as if I could take no more I burst "PLEASE YOU SADISTIC FUCKING BASTARD"  he chuckled then thankfully gave me the words I needed "yea you can"

"what'd you say" I asked to make sure that was a can and not a "cant"
"go ahead"

Want to know the entire scene?Or the dominants POV
Visit Sirs blog
www.theswitchedlife.blogspot.com

greed and lust

Inside I feel the days counting down. Each day, one more I have spent with Sir but one less until the day he leaves me for the military.
I've been greedy and im getting more so. I want him with me in every moment. Crave his touch, his love, his words, his presence at a constant. I know this will only make it harder to fathom his departure and harder more so to function with out him.
I want even his punishments more so before he leaves so I have more to cling to while he is gone. Well...perhaps not so much as a punishment as a flogging, spanking, ride crop session, bindings and more pushed to every limit and further until he leaves so that in some way I can feel stronger when he leaves from me.
I haven't explained this to him yet, the exact reasons and desires behind my greed.
I know I should but such discussions only bring abput sadness. The pain of knowing that for the first time since our paths have merged we will be apart for an extended period of time and not just apart but without communication.
Sure there will be letters written but it's not the same as a face to face interaction. When a relationship becomes an LDR even video meetings are so painfully different from the accustomed face to face, hand to hand, body to body, mouth to mouth....love and encounters.
You dont take into account how much you take having him with you and serving him and pleasing him for granted until you are promised to lose that....
I've built my entire day to day joys and plans around loving and pleasing him....what will I do without him....how will I find joy when I will have no ways of bringing hum joy for two straight months only to hold hum again for a week and then lose him again for an unsigned amount of time?
I also fearful to kniw a life without him...

his POV

How strange of a thought to know Sir will be blogging too now. To know that as I write this entry he sits mere feet away from me at his own laptop writing his own first post. What a strange thought that for some events I will write to you about, the flip side, my dominants view and feelings of those moments will also be publicized.
Well to you all that is.
We made the agreement when I began MY blog that he was not to read any post I wrote or write until  I said I was ready for him to read it as some would contain surprises and plans for him. We have decided that that same rule is in place in regards to when and if I am to read any of his posts.
I am always intrigued, however to see and hear how others perceive the exact same encounters as myself and how their perceptions can so greatly vary and mesh with my own.
So all in all this an intriguing topic to me. Just hoping he writes more here than he does in his own journal  :P then again....im bad for not writing for long stretches myself do I suppose in a way this idea of him blogging too now is a good one. After all I've been writing more often than before at least(:

theswitchedlife.blogspot.com

Sir's Ink

i feel like writing today but dont really know what i want to write about. theres much but i dont even know how to place it all into the correct order yet...so until i figure that one out, i figured id give you guys an excert of a story Sir has been working on.

curious to see what you all think of his writing style and such.

    My name is Jade, I have always stuck out in the group of people, my olive skin is a shear give away that I’m not from the Empire; not to mention my ears. I have dark hair, and gray eyes so that is another indicator towards the factor to me not being from around here. I work for the Imperials, and I have for all of my life. I’m the only woman commander in the entire Empire, which is found to be a joke. Most groups of people leave my battalion at bay because they know the name of the Black Hearts.

    The bush behind me begins to rustle and I quickly draw my knives, I have made many enemies in the empire and I am always on guard. A familiar voice leaves the heavy brush, “Whoa, Commander, its just me.” A man appears from the dense brush and begins to smile. He is what most women would call “Fair toned and handsome,” I know him much too well to even think of him as the “Loving Husband”. Beneath his sky blue eyes and his pale skin, under the ornament of grayish gold hair, lays the coldest man I could possibly know.
    “Hey Drago, what do you need to tell me.” He begins to let out a slight sigh, and the sarcasm in his voice is obvious, “Well the war is over forever, you and the rest of the Sixth Regiment can go home, and Monarch’s enemies are all slain.”
    “If it were all like that, I would go to my home in the Capital and just sleep for hours after a soothing bath, possibly jam my face full of the sweetest delicacies I possibly could find.”
    “Well now, this is the real news, Adrith has just advanced leaving the Sixth in charge of stopping him,” Drago’s face shifted into a displeasing manner, “Also we have to take them on in combat.”
    “No, we will not lose our men in the battle, we will settle this the way we always have.”
    “I will report that the orders are understood,” His face returned back to its normal composure.
    The way we made a name for ourselves is never losing a single soldier, the way we fight brings immense controversy. We call them the Black Games,  in the three days before the battle we will mentally disturb and unhinge the people on the other side. It works; I’ve never lost a soldier, even though this has come close to making me lose my own life.
    “Get the men ready to move, I know it is only a three day march to the lead of Adrith.”
    “Ma’am, it is closer to an hour or so, Adrith is already on the battle path he does not know we are here.”
    “Cover the fires, get ready to start, The games are as follows, The Axe of War, The Twelve Points, and The Ghost Fires.”
    “His scouts will be on top of us in an hour.”
    “We will swap uniforms and use their own men against them. However, this is a tactic we have never used; have one of our scouts get the uniform and enter his base. That man needs to get as close to Adrith as possible, and take out a guard, then get back to camp as soon as possible after losing their trail in the opposite direction.”
    “Okay anything else?” Drago’s face shifted to a cold war hardened look.
    “Tell the men to write their letters if we have to go into war I want them to have their peace made and for them to have no worry in the afterlife.” I stood and began to make the walk back to the main camp of my men, “Wait, I’ll tell them, if anyone should it is me.”

    We drew nearer and nearer, the tunnel vision I often get on walks began to set in, leaving tracers pushing the trees past my vision in a swift blur. The sound of a lute came from the far side of the camp as we entered bringing me back into consciousness. I walked to my tent, seeing all of the men standing in my presence never retires my respect for them; not a single man stood for the previous Commander.
    “Men, I stand before you not only as your leader but as one of you in combat. I am here to tell you the man of the hour is Adrith, his soul will be brought to its knees after today. He has set up camp near us, and he is now our target of the Black Games. His scouts should be around here at any moment in attempt to find enemy forces. We will find them first, and we will enter his camp, and slay the nearest man to him. To start the Games tonight the Axe of War will be placed.  Tonight their tents will earn some new decoration.”

    The men began to shuffle from the crowd and as soon as the throng of men dissipated into there tents, another group all bearing axes appear from the woods. The center element steps forward, “Ma’am we are all ready for your command, there are two extra axes carried by the last element if you would like to join us.”
    “I will join you, nightfall should be within the next half hour, We will start our journey then.” I heard the men pressing me with a slight hum, it proceeded through the ranks slowly adding on the bard’s ocarinas and then their lutes. The melody was one I have heard hundreds of times, it still chills the blood in my veins, I began to hum along with the men, it was a simple pattern. But with  the combination of the noises played it was enough to make any army stronger showing the bonds we held within each other. I simply began to sway my arms, to the beat of the song, My body began to flow like water at the smooth sound of the battle song, “Men I stand here waiting . . .” In this small pause the breath of the men pushed the sound of any music away, “Waiting to cause the horror to the mere mortals sitting unguarded and relaxed in their tents with the illusion of safety, well we are here to give them a nightmare.” Just as I finished that sentence I looked across the men’s faces, the look held of vampires, cold and blood thirsty.

honesty

People almost always begin a conversations with "well how are you" or some variant on the first word there, but how often do we expect the true answer? How often do they actually care to know?

Ask anyone "how are you" and the most common response you'll receive is "oh im ok" and maybe a few supporting details. But how often are these "ok" people not so ok? How often do they have so much that they'd love to talk about and get off of they're chest but for some reason or another, usually fear, they refrain from telling what's really going through their hearts and minds.

I think we are all guilty of it. we hold back so as to not burden our friends or family or to not be judged. We hold back because no stranger wants to know or cares at all about out inner workings.

but oddly enough strangers are sometimes the best people to talk to, yet people are so used to people only wanting particular answers that we're only give those answers to everyone.

One day in middle school a girl came up to me and sat down "hi, i'm britany and I don't know you but i'm new here and can we talk?"

I thought it was an odd way for a thirteen year old girl to introduce herself but on a lonely day like it was I was glad for the conversation no matter what we were going to talk about.

She began talking of how she had recently moved in to her grandfathers house. Of how she thought her mother didn't love her and how the woman had abandoned her in numerous places and how she hoped her grandparents would keep her and she finally had a place to stay. She told me of her favorite memories from grandfather and her least favorites of her mother. She cried a little at the end then hugged me and thanked me for just letting get talk. "I know you don't care about any of thus but I needed to tell some one"

We became friends for a little while after that. Talking here and there when no one else was around then more comfortably around everyone else until one day she moved again and soon after so did I.

looking back I admire that courage that she had. So few people have that courage to tell truthfully and completely honestly how they are feeling. More and more of us are getting more comfortable doing it in places like this where we can remain faceless and got fear the judgement. But in so few times do we have the courage to talk to a stranger when we need it or to go up to someone else who needs it and just give them someone to talk to. To lend some little bit of hope to a stranger.

So here's my challenge to all of you. If you see someone suffering go up to them and offer them an ear or a shoulder, you'd amazed how big of a difference that small gesture can make sometimes. And dont be afraid to ask someone for that solace to sit down and let you vent. What have you got to lose aside from some pain and anxt. What have you got to gain? The possibilities run from a friend to just some relief. You never know until you try.

I hope you all have a great day and if you arent.. Remember you dont have to be alone unless you make it that way.